Safe Thus Far

You want God's promise that nothing bad will happen to you and yours, but Child, you no longer count as severe the truly intense sorrows you have already faced.  And because you now undervalue both their intensity and God's strength that afforded you passage through them, you have not given Him the credit that would afford you a measure of peace now.  The grace that has brought you safe thus far has been underestimated and underappreciated by you.  You laugh, you eat, you sleep, and you are not haunted by the horrors you have faced. 

Trust in the Lord, my dear one.  You are entering a spacious place.  Do not be afraid.  

The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.

--Deuteronomy 33:27 

This is what the Lord says— he who made a way through the sea, a path through the mighty waters, “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.
--Isaiah 43:16, 18-19

 

Another Word Regarding Humility

Humility and humiliation are two very different things; do not confuse the two or believe that the Lord intends you the harm of humiliation.  Humility is a virtue adopted by choice; it is a determination to put the needs of others ahead of one's own. By contrast, humiliation is like a weapon in the hand of a bully.  When other people seem to assume that everything about them is of greater importance and value than anything about you, the Lord isn't in this.  He will never tell you that you are less important to Him than someone else. 

Considering others better than yourself does not mean you are unaware of their sins, but that you trust the Lord for your needs and thus do not need to fight for your own rights. It becomes safe for you to consider others ahead of yourself, because you trust the Lord to be your defender. Humility, for a Christian, is not a choice to be inferior, but rather is an outward expression of the confidence you have in Christ to take care of you. God does not want you to see yourself and your needs as being of less worth than those of others.  He want you to rest in the confidence that you are of great value to Him, and that He will not forsake you or forget you.  You have food they do not know of.  Do you see it? 

I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better.  I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people,  and his incomparably great power for us who believe.

--Ephesians 8:17-19a

On Humility

You are a treasure to the Lord. But do not mistake His love for you as evidence of your superiority.  

False humility is a type of pride. You have developed the habit of groveling because you have become used to the assumption that others may feel jealous or inferior, but this actually communicates  “I know I’m superior to you and I’m trying to put you at your ease.”   

Do not attempt to change your personality, which is a unique and multifaceted jewel, created by God.  You are indeed precious in His sight.  But please do be willing to release your persona, which is something very different.  Your personality is who you were created to be, while your persona is who you want other human beings to think you are. 

Consider an exchange of your persona for that of Christ Jesus. In His human form, Christ was inoffensive (until He stood up to preach) because of His humility. Be inoffensive in your humility. Defer to the desires of others, and let others take the lead.  

When combined with a desire to prove yourself superior, fear of rejection makes you a danger to those you ought to be shepherding with Christ's love.  Let interactions with your fellow human beings be governed by Christ's love and humility.  

Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ....
--Romans 13:14

But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him.  It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord.” 

--1 Corinthians 1:27-29

But this beautiful treasure is contained in us—cracked pots made of earth and clay—so that the transcendent character of this power will be clearly seen as coming from God and not from us.

--2 Corinthians 4:7 The Voice Translation

Before You Were Born, He Knew You

You are moving forward. You cannot examine yourself as you are in the process of change and renewal, but God sees your heart. He knows you and is with you. Trust Him when He says you are on right on His schedule, the one He planned especially for you long before you were born. Do not be afraid.

 …he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus
--Philippians 1:6

Arm Yourself

Child, the Lord is on your side, and He provides you tools that will enable you to survive the strategies of the forces arrayed against you.  Use these tools.  Withdrawing from the battle does not work, because the battle will not withdraw from you.  A soldier who will not fight can nevertheless suffer injury.  Arm yourself. 

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 

--Ephesians 6:10-18

Past Sin

You make two errors with past sin: one is to brush it off and say it is of no account because it happened so long ago, and another is to mislabel it as adventure or fun so that sins committed in youth become interwoven with a longing for days past.

We are not to feel guilt over forgiven sin, but we should feel humility at the remembrance of it because of its shame. Remember that the release from that shame was purchased at great cost to the Almighty God through the suffering and death of Jesus Christ. Do not forget that the same power that raised Him from the dead is at work in you. 

Between childhood and adulthood, all human beings commit sins that require repentance. Unconfessed sin from any time of life can stand as a barrier to healing and revival. Read the account of a dead girl and a sick woman in Mark 5, and let the Lord speak to your heart today: Jesus wants to heal the adult you have become and bring the child you were back to life. 

Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.--1 Timothy 1:15

...I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms... --Ephesians 1:18-20

When you are angry with God...

If you hold back from releasing frustration and anger to the Lord, you will punish other human beings for what has come to you by God's hand. Be respectful and remember that you address the Almighty God, but do share your heartache with Him. 

Do not repress the Holy Spirit within.  Silencing God's voice will magnify your sense of grief and longing many times over. Let the Spirit flow and be comforted. 

You may desire to hurt Him for what He has allowed you to suffer, but your efforts will not succeed.  Jesus suffered once for the entirety of human grief and sin that will occur to the end of time. Therefore He has already  weathered the blows of your heartache and anger and gained victory over them by His suffering.  You can choose to participate in His victory.

Although in one mood you may feel vindictive toward your Creator, in another you may actually fear that your expressions of anguish or anger will hurt Him.  Again, remember the price for your pain has already been paid; rest in the understanding that the travail of the Cross is finished. You do not cause additional sorrow for Christ by partaking of the forgiveness and healing His suffering purchased. The opposite is true; your comfort is His consolation.   

You don't need to forgive Him, you need to trust Him. Let Him search your heart. Confess if you have sinned in response to the blow you have received.  Pour out your hurt to Him. Partake of His peace, place your trust in Him, and rest.