Past Sin

You make two errors with past sin: one is to brush it off and say it is of no account because it happened so long ago, and another is to mislabel it as adventure or fun so that sins committed in youth become interwoven with a longing for days past.

We are not to feel guilt over forgiven sin, but we should feel humility at the remembrance of it because of its shame. Remember that the release from that shame was purchased at great cost to the Almighty God through the suffering and death of Jesus Christ. Do not forget that the same power that raised Him from the dead is at work in you. 

Between childhood and adulthood, all human beings commit sins that require repentance. Unconfessed sin from any time of life can stand as a barrier to healing and revival. Read the account of a dead girl and a sick woman in Mark 5, and let the Lord speak to your heart today: Jesus wants to heal the adult you have become and bring the child you were back to life. 

Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.--1 Timothy 1:15

...I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms... --Ephesians 1:18-20

When you are angry with God...

If you hold back from releasing frustration and anger to the Lord, you will punish other human beings for what has come to you by God's hand. Be respectful and remember that you address the Almighty God, but do share your heartache with Him. 

Do not repress the Holy Spirit within.  Silencing God's voice will magnify your sense of grief and longing many times over. Let the Spirit flow and be comforted. 

You may desire to hurt Him for what He has allowed you to suffer, but your efforts will not succeed.  Jesus suffered once for the entirety of human grief and sin that will occur to the end of time. Therefore He has already  weathered the blows of your heartache and anger and gained victory over them by His suffering.  You can choose to participate in His victory.

Although in one mood you may feel vindictive toward your Creator, in another you may actually fear that your expressions of anguish or anger will hurt Him.  Again, remember the price for your pain has already been paid; rest in the understanding that the travail of the Cross is finished. You do not cause additional sorrow for Christ by partaking of the forgiveness and healing His suffering purchased. The opposite is true; your comfort is His consolation.   

You don't need to forgive Him, you need to trust Him. Let Him search your heart. Confess if you have sinned in response to the blow you have received.  Pour out your hurt to Him. Partake of His peace, place your trust in Him, and rest.  

Grief

Don’t exchange past joy for current grief; keep the precious memories and release the sorrow.  Blessings that were real in the past lose none of their reality in the one eternal God who is above time and space, so dwell in Him; abide in His reality.  He will keep you grounded to Himself and to no other version of truth; you can trust His perceptions because He is God. Share His point of view.  Remember that love makes the transition from time to eternity; love remains (1 Corinthians 13:13).  In God you are safe, and all that was of Him in the past still is, and all that is of Him in your present will always be.  

"For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully understood. 13 So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love." -- 1 Corinthians 13:12-13

Suffering

You have not exaggerated your loved ones' difficulties or your own.  The only error you make is one of reasoning; you believe that such challenges are unusual, possible to avoid if different people or circumstances were involved.  Sorrow is not unusual and is impossible to avoid.

However, your need isn't less urgent simply because it stems from common sufferings.

One of the strategies Satan utilizes is that of portraying your pain as inconsequential because so many other people endure the same challenge.  This provides false comfort and a dismissive attitude toward suffering, neither of which are of the Lord. 

A refusal to trivialize that which should not be trivialized is a facet of the spiritual gift of discernment.  Apart from discernment, you label suffering with tags that trivialize its impact and encourages escapism. People who idolize escapism do not want to talk about suffering in any way that allows it the true sculpting and honing power God intends.  They don’t mind turning it into an experience they can use to impress others in order to elevate their own status, but to acknowledge the reality of pain opens the terrifying possibility that it may recur. And so they trivialize it so far as the suffering goes and magnify it in an almost humorous way as an attention drawing experience.

Very few people have courage to speak the truth about suffering.  If you choose to be one of those few, you will be invaluable as an intercessor and a friend. 

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"Dear ones, don’t be surprised when you experience your trial by fire. It is not something strange and unusual..." 

1 Peter 4:12  The Voice